Me and Jax out last night

Wheelie Bin Update

Both our bins now have locks fitted courtesy of my dad.

I feel very triumphant now we have foiled the bin infiltrators.

Mrs McLoughlin and the Avocado

We have been plagued by call centres ever since we got a landline in our flat. They never ask for us. They always ask for Mr or Mrs McLoughlin, more often for Mrs McLoughlin.

As we only got NTL installed (and therefore our phone number) about a month after we moved in and also that the previous occupants of the flat used BT, we know that the phonecalls aren't for anyone who used to live in this flat.

My dad's theory is that NTL have given us a recycled phone number so our number used to belong to the McLoughlins. Dad says that phone companies are supposed to wait for a set amount of time (he thinks it's 6 years) before using a phone number again. Considering the amount of call centres we've had hassling us, I doubt very much that NTL have waited that long before re-allocating our phone number.

We have been very patient with the call centres. Every time they ask for Mrs McLoughlin, we have told them that there is no-one of that name here and they've got the wrong number. They clearly don't believe us because the same call centres keep calling back asking for this Sheila McLoughlin woman. We know a few of the call centres are repeatedly calling us because we've done 1471. Sometimes the number is withheld but there are two numbers that we have had repeated calls from despite having told them on several occasions that they've got the wrong number.

We've stopped answering the phone in the flat now because everytime we do, it's a bloody call centre and we're getting really fed up with it now.

However, last night at around half sevenish, the phone rang and Jackie decided she would answer it.

Jackie answered the phone and said "Hello". I could tell by her face that there had been no response which is a definite sign that there is a call centre on the other end. They always seem to be a bit slow to speak for some reason.

"If it's for Mrs McLoughlin, tell them she's dead," I said. "Tell them she got hit by an avocado."

After a moment, It was obvious by Jackie's expression that the person on the other end was asking for Mrs McLoughlin.

Jackie replied in a very serious dead-pan voice to the call centre monkey:

"I'm sorry, she choked to death on an avocado. Goodbye."

______

Help Required to Combat Bin Crime!!!

Some bugger or buggers in our block of flats keeps putting their rubbish in our bin!!!

This has previously led to our bin being full up and there not being any space to put our own rubbish in it. The foreign rubbish has contained things like plastic bottles which are supposed to go in the recycling bin belonging to each flat.

The reason the culprit or culprits have not used their recycling bin may be because it is full of general household waste. There has been a blue (recycling) bin with the other bins for definitely at least a month. It keeps getting put out the front on bin day but the council will not lift it and have put a sign on it saying that it should contain recycling waste only and that the household waste should be removed from it. Whoever put the rubbish in it hasn't bothered to remove it and its been there for weeks and weeks.

We put a sign on our bin saying it was only for rubbish belonging to flat 30 (there is a big 30 written on the bin!!) and that if they do not have their own bin, they should call the council who will provide them with one.

Since we put that note on our bin, we have had 2 bags of someone else's rubbish put in our bin. The audacity of it!!!

The problem is we don't know who is doing it. We were trying to think of ways of stopping them putting rubbish in our bin, but it's not possible to lock the bin and there is nowhere we could hide it. My dad suggested we booby trap it.

It would be nice if we could put something in it that would jump out and scare the crap out of them, or better still attack them!!

Anyway, I welcome all suggestions of ways to stop this infiltration and violation of Arthur (that's our bin).

Please help!!

I've got a sore throat

Therefore I am eating chocolate because there is apparently something in chocolate that helps if you have a sore throat. I am going to get ice cream later if I ever bother to get out of bed and get dressed. I feel all horrible and my head hurts too.

Despite the fact that I now have Freeview, there is still bugger all on TV (until Jeeves and Wooster later this afternoon).

You may be under the impression that I am only posting on my blog in order to grumble and complain, that is not the case, well not entirely.

Anyway, my birthday went well. Got very very drunk. Had a good night with people from work and Jax. I only remember patches though.

Apparently, when we got back to the flat (although I have absolutely no memory of this)..........apparently I was walking around the flat with a square of Green and Black's chocolate on my eye saying it was my SAT NAV system and it was helping me locate the fridge to get the cider.

?!?!?!?!?!? I have no idea how or why I came up with that!

It's quite scary I don't remember though. Quite concerned about what else I might have done that I don't remember!!!!!

I'm older now!!!

Arrghhh!!!!

Do you have a comfort station here??

That's what an american tourist asked me at work today!!!

I've never heard it called that before!!

I don't know why americans can't just say the word. Why do they have to be so inventive about it?

It's as if it is some sort of taboo - "the thing that cannot be named."
It's as if they are scared or embarrassed about saying TOILET!!!